21/04/2026
FOUR PEOPLE THAT SUFFER FROM FAMILIARITY.
1. Colleagues
Usually it is people who know you closely who suffer from familiarity.
When I started my church as a medical student, very few of my colleagues were able to receive from me. They knew me too well
and would say in their hearts, “Is this not Dag? We know him and we know his class. We saw him struggling at an exam last week. We
know when he passes and when he fails! How can this lanky boy call himself a pastor?”
2. Relatives
Relatives also suffer from familiarity.
They would say. “Is this not Azoyzoy's (my father's nickname)son? We carried him when he was a baby.”
They ask, “Do you remember me? I carried you when you were two years old.”They say, “I knew your father very well.”
With this background, how can such people receive me as a man of God?
3. Pastors' wives
Pastor's wives often suffer from severe familiarity. Just like Michal, when everyone is impressed, they are not impressed with their
husbands. They say things like, “I know you”, “No one knows you better than I do”, “I am the only one who can tell you certain things!” “I
am not one of those people who give you praise and affirmation in the office!”, “If people knew how you really were, they would be
surprised”, “No one knows what you are really like.”
In a sense, they are right about all these things, but the fact is that they are also victims of familiarity!
4. Close friends and Associates
These people also experience familiarity. They have been around you for so long and they have seen your vicissitudes. It is easy to slip
and slide into familiarity. Sometimes it would be better not to know someone closely in order not to develop an air of familiarity.
Familiarity breeds disloyalty.
Familiarity created Judas. Judas is referred to, as “mine own familiar friend”. When people are familiar, they lose their respect and they
cross boundaries they should never cross. Familiarity makes people say things they should never say.
When Michal spoke against David, she stood in the shoes of a rebel fighting and opposing God's anointed. She became a critic of “the
man after God's own heart”. David had built a tabernacle but she was not impressed. God called him “a man after mine own heart” but she, a mere mortal, despised him.
Imagine that God is impressed but
you are not impressed. Isn't it amazing?
Familiarity often stems from jealousy and carnality. Michal was jealous of the girls who seemed to appreciate David's ministry. She disliked the fact that David seemed to be
impressed with these young whippersnappers.
Then David returned to bless his household.
And Michal the daughter of Saul came out tomeet David, and said, HOWnGLORIOUS WAS THE KING TODAY, who uncovered himself
to day in the eyes of the handmaids of his servants, as one of the vain fellows
shamelessly uncovereth himself!
2 Samuel 6:20
When Miriam criticized Moses, she no longer saw him as God's anointed. She moved into the flesh and became a disloyal rebel.
- Bishop Dag Heward-Mills (Church Planting)
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