Yuba River Collective

Yuba River Collective A community-based volunteer network dedicated to environmental stewardship, civic engagement, and the gentle art of washing away authoritarian grime.

From car washes to community potlucks, we believe in clean water, clean cars, and clear consciences. 🌊🧽

South Carolina’s “Giraffe King” Creates World’s First Compact Giraffes Fair Play, SC -- In the modest township of Fair P...
06/05/2026

South Carolina’s “Giraffe King” Creates World’s First Compact Giraffes Fair Play, SC -- In the modest township of Fair Play, South Carolina, a peculiar gentleman named Bobby Lee Jenkins resides. This man, possessing a spirit as fiery as the Carolinian sun, has dedicated himself to a most curious endeavor: the creation of the first family of short-necked giraffes. And I daresay dear reader, he has succeeded.

This outlandish story of Farmer Jenkins could rival even the tall tales of the great riverboats that traverse the Mississippi. Mr. Jenkins, a true Southern oddity, has become something of a local legend, spoken of in hushed tones and baffled whispers. The townsfolk, you see, have compared this odd duck to that infamous fellow, Joe Exotic, the so-called Tiger King, because of his penchant for the exotic and the bizarre.

When asked about his newfound success, Mr. Jenkins, clad in his signature overalls and a straw hat, drawled, "Well, I reckon I have done it for the love

Meet Bobby Lee Jenkins, the quirky South Carolinian behind the world's first short-necked giraffes!

Josh Hawley Defeats Fragile Masculinity by Staring into Mirror, Declares Himself Victor Jefferson City, MO – Senator Jos...
06/05/2026

Josh Hawley Defeats Fragile Masculinity by Staring into Mirror, Declares Himself Victor Jefferson City, MO – Senator Josh Hawley emerged victorious over the elusive enemy he has long warned the nation about: fragile masculinity. The Missouri senator reportedly achieved this landmark victory after a grueling 10-minute session staring into his bathroom mirror, during which he vanquished what he described as “the internal weakness plaguing American men.”

“I stared into my soul, and I saw the battle between strength and vulnerability,” Hawley announced at a press conference, wiping a solitary bead of sweat from his perfectly square jaw. “I confronted the fragility, I challenged it, and I won. The weak men of this country need to take note.”

Sources close to Hawley claim that the senator had been training for this moment for weeks, incorporating a rigorous regime of flexing in front of reflective surfaces, grunting during weightlifting sessions, and reading excerpts from

Senator Josh Hawley triumphantly declared victory over fragile masculinity after a tense mirror-staring session. The media offered its usual half-baked coverage while Hawley inspired men nationwide to follow his lead.

Easter Egg Dash Prepares Kids for Reality TV, say A&E Producers Grass Valley, CA -- Producers of the popular US document...
06/04/2026

Easter Egg Dash Prepares Kids for Reality TV, say A&E Producers

Grass Valley, CA -- Producers of the popular US documentary TV show Hoarders, which depicts the real-life struggles and treatment of people who suffer from compulsive hoarding disorder, announced late Saturday night that they couldn't be more thrilled with the results of the recent Easter Egg 'hunts" in Grass Valley, CA.

"These are valuable American skills," said A&E Hoarders producer John K. Duke in a The Fazzler telephone interview. "And we are thrilled to see parents instilling these aggressive values into their children as such an early age. This ensures at least one more generation of enabled consumers who are the perfect demographic for our show. We're gonna run longer than the Simpsons, for sure."

Easter Egg hunts or "dashes" are typically organized by community groups for fun. The events involve volunteers placing both real and hollow plastic eggs filled with candy in a field, and then allowing

Producers of the popular US documentary TV show Hoarders announced Saturday that they were pleased with the recent Easter Egg 'hunts" in Grass Valley, CA.

USA Paralympic Team Refuses to Stand During Star Spangled Banner! Colorado Springs, CO -- A controversy erupted over the...
06/04/2026

USA Paralympic Team Refuses to Stand During Star Spangled Banner!

Colorado Springs, CO -- A controversy erupted over the weekend when the United States Paralympics Team refused to stand for the National Anthem during their annual fall tryouts. The team, known for courage and perseverance, shocked the relatively conservative community of Colorado Springs and sparked outrage from local citizens and many patriots across the country.

"I don't know what they're thinking they're trying to prove," said David L. Brett of Stone Mountain, Georgia, in a The Fazzler telephone interview, "but this whole protesting America thing has gone too far. They need to get out there and play and stop turning everything into a political statement about the blacks. We need to get back to when America was first, and your feelings were second or third. Or whatever."

The United States (USA) has participated in every Summer and Winter Paralympic Games and is the all-time leader in medals. The first

A controversy erupted over the weekend when the United States Paralympics Team refused to stand for the National Anthem during their annual fall tryouts.

Nevada City Decriminalizes Public Nudity Nevada City, CA -- After years of government lobbying by activist groups, Nevad...
06/04/2026

Nevada City Decriminalizes Public Nudity Nevada City, CA -- After years of government lobbying by activist groups, Nevada City announced this week that it will become the nation's first to decriminalize all forms of public nudity and actively encourage it. During a surprisingly uncontentious vote, all members of the city council voted to strike all mentions of public nudity from the police code.

"People are born without any clothes on," said local nudist advocate Lillian Young of the Body Freedom Collaborative (BFC) speaking after the decision in front of the National Hotel, "but only the police, judges and the government can decide if its offensive or not? Come on. The people of BFC have collectively spent fifteen years in jail because of our belief in the beauty of the human body."

The language in the new ordinance specifies that no police officer or another government official shall interfere with or impede "the public display of nudity as long as a said nudist is not in

Nevada City, CA — After years of government lobbying by activist groups, Nevada City announced this week that it will become the nation’s first to decriminalize all forms of public nudity and actively encourage it. During a surprisingly uncontentious vote, all members of the city council voted t...

Penn Valley Woman Notices Grammatical Errors Penn Valley, CA -- Mary Shilling of Penn Valley has noticed grammatical err...
06/03/2026

Penn Valley Woman Notices Grammatical Errors

Penn Valley, CA -- Mary Shilling of Penn Valley has noticed grammatical errors in several Nevada County on-line and print publications. And she is not happy about it.

"Hey, I just can't read an article with spelling and usage errors," said Mary Shilling of Penn Valley. "Professionals should know how to write well. Like our Founders did. Thomas Jefferson didn't have spell-check."

Ms. Shilling also commented that she doesn't vote for anyone who has grammar errors in the Voter's Guide. "I won't vote for anyone who has typos or tense issues in the voter's pamphlet."

When The Fazzler informed her that the voter's guides are published by the government and are subject to errors introduced beyond the control of the candidates, she replied, "I don't care. How can we expect people to lead if they can't spell or use the proper form of there/their/they're?"

Penn Valley, CA — Mary Shilling of Penn Valley has noticed grammatical errors in several Nevada County on-line and print publications. And she is not happy about it. “Hey, I just can’t read an article with spelling and usage errors,” said Mary Shilling of Penn Valley. “Professionals should...

32 Photos from INSIDE Chemtrail Planes Like You’ve NEVER Seen Before! Gregory Darknight, an author and editor at Chemtra...
06/03/2026

32 Photos from INSIDE Chemtrail Planes Like You’ve NEVER Seen Before! Gregory Darknight, an author and editor at Chemtrail Action Network received an intriguing private message from someone on Facebook. This is the message:
Hi Greg, I follow your action network website everyday and I'm thankful there are like-minded people like yourself who are aware of global things that I have known since I was a little girl. I came across some photos from a trusted source of the inside of planes that are used for chemtrails and I figured if I passed them on to you, you can help spread more awareness with it on your website. Let me know if this is OK with you. Thanks."
Gregory saw the images and he immediately wanted to know who the source was and if they wanted to elaborate on these photos. He was told:
Unfortunately my source does not want to be known and would rather remain anonymous I'm sure they have some pretty good reasons and I must respect their wishes. As long as the information gets

What follows next are 32 secret and previously confidential images that prove that there is a coordinated conspiracy to control us and our planet. You will never be the same after seeing these.

Local Creamery Discontinuing Popular Butter-by-Mail Service Nevada City, CA -- Despite a surprising demand, local Better...
06/03/2026

Local Creamery Discontinuing Popular Butter-by-Mail Service

Nevada City, CA -- Despite a surprising demand, local Better Butter Creamery has decided to discontinue sending their award-winning butter via the US Mail due to numerous complaints from delivery personnel. According to Melonie Gregory, the owner and dairy master at Better Butter, they had shipped over 40,000lbs of their product all over the United States in the past few months. Still, they stopped shipments this week after receiving a cease and desist from the United States Post Office and UPS.

"When we started this service last November, we had no idea it would be this popular. So it's a sad day for us here at the Better Butter Creamery," said a tired and frustrated Ms. Gregory. "We had fans all over the country. We got letters from as far away as Poland after people started smuggling it into the country. But we started receiving complaints in May from the Post Office that our product was leaking out of the packages. So,

Nevada City's Better Butter Creamery will discontinue its popular butter-by-mail service.

Long Toilet Lines Planned for Burning Man Black Rock Dessert, NV -- As the battle for control wages between Burning Man ...
06/02/2026

Long Toilet Lines Planned for Burning Man

Black Rock Dessert, NV -- As the battle for control wages between Burning Man event organizers and the Bureau of Land Management or BLM, the government agency has one trick up its sleeve to finally get the upper hand on the popular, week-long art festival located in the middle of the Nevada Dessert: no toilets. In what is being called the most "blatant and arrogant move to disrupt one of Earth's most popular events," organizers suspect that this latest blockage is an attempt to shut the festival down for good.

"BLM doesn't want us there anymore," said ',' a 9 year veteran of the event from his Nevada City, CA home. "And now they're asking us to build them a 5 million dollar compound with flushing toilets. Just for them. Yet, if we need to take a crap, we have to drive all the way to Reno. It's bu****it."

According to the BLM, the agency has become increasingly concerned about the event's impact on the fragile desert

In what is being called the most "blatant and arrogant move to disrupt one of Earth's most popular events," organizers suspect that this latest blockage is an attempt to shut the festival down for good.

Area Man To Lawfully Wed The Constitution Penn Valley, CA -- Area community activist, Tea Party member and formerly over...
06/02/2026

Area Man To Lawfully Wed The Constitution

Penn Valley, CA -- Area community activist, Tea Party member and formerly overly enthusiastic Glenn Beck supporter Brock Whalen announced on his website that he plans on lawfully wedding the United States Constitution. Mr. Whalen is the sole proprietor of bringbackbeck.com, a website dedicated to bringing Glenn Beck back to speak in Nevada County, even though the controversial public figure has never visited the area.

"It is my right as an American to lawfully wed our most sacred, god-given document," noted Mr. Whalen on his website. "If the g**s can get married, then I should be able to marry the Constitution. Before my witnesses I vow to love it and care for it as long as we both shall live. I take you with all of your faults, which are few, and your strengths, as I offer myself to you with all of my faults and strengths."

Mr. Whalen, who has been active in the Penn Valley political scene, recently served on the Park Commission

Area community activist, Tea Party member and formerly overly enthusiastic Glenn Beck supporter Brock Whalen announced on his website that he plans on lawfully wedding the United States Constitution.

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