Northport News Network

Northport News Network Contact information, map and directions, contact form, opening hours, services, ratings, photos, videos and announcements from Northport News Network, Government Organization, Northport, AL.

The Northport News Network is an amateur team of unsophisticated journalists committed to bringing you the latest breaking news, BS, satire, facts and fiction that you may or may not need to know or care about.

City of Northport to hold weekly auditions for Shart Tank. Shart Tank is very similar to Shark Tank where anyone with an...
06/29/2026

City of Northport to hold weekly auditions for Shart Tank. Shart Tank is very similar to Shark Tank where anyone with an idea, a recipe or concept is welcome to come pitch their ideas to the judges!
Shart Tank will begin this Wednesday evening at 5:30 PM inside the Northport City Hall. If you are making plans to be cast on Shart Tank bring good vibes and cash bribes!

While both may be pronounced by many southerners to sound the same, the N.N.N would like to remind our followers of the ...
06/21/2026

While both may be pronounced by many southerners to sound the same, the N.N.N would like to remind our followers of the true enunciation and significance of each photo.

The first photo depicts a MARE (rhymes with hair or Air) and refers to a female horse used for breeding, equestrian sports and is often found to be very useful for herd leadership.

The second image depicts a Mayor and the proper way to say this is May-Ur. A mayor is the chief executive officer of a municipality, responsible for overseeing daily city operations, managing the municipal budget, and enforcing local ordinances.

One of these photos indicates a person with more authority, power, influence and ability to lead than the other.

While this post is in no way meant to discredit or show disrespect to Mayor Phillips it is meant to show the current structure and power you think your vote may or may not have and who is truly in control.

If you do not like the current situations in Northport, do some research and when you see Mayor MAY-UR Phillips please thank him for representing for being elected to an honorary position (a position that does pay a small salary albeit) but a position of responsibility and leadership of which he has no true authority or oversight and control over.

Success of a city is not measured by tomorrow or next year, but in its planning and ability over the next 25-50 years to have the infrastructure and resources to plan big for the future. Does it make sense for the City of Tuscaloosa to own and control the Airport in Northport (maybe for financial reasons now, but what if that situation had been different many years ago and today I was referred to as Northport Airport). Does it make sense for the City of Tuscaloosa to own and control Lake Tuscaloosa and when you need building permits etc you have to cross the bridge into the City of Tuscaloosa to deal with folks you don’t even know or elected to beg for permits etc (again, perhaps financially there are reasons the City of Northport cannot control it). If we do not plan for the next 25-50 years NOW instead of only thinking about tomorrow or next year what will the City of Tuscaloosa control next? My guess will be restaurants, resorts and all retail taxes in what will be formerly known as Northport.

While these are opinions they in no way reflect the opinions of the N.N.N

06/21/2026

District 4 continues to grow. Come on out and celebrate the first annual bike rally at the new parts store and mavis tire coming soon

BREAKING Northport Mayor Dale Phillips realizes being mayor of Northport is nuthin but an honorary title as he has no po...
06/18/2026

BREAKING

Northport Mayor Dale Phillips realizes being mayor of Northport is nuthin but an honorary title as he has no power. Dale Phillips, highly respected retired officer of TPD Violent Crimes Unit and now Mayor of the 3rd city in the history of the State of Alabama to go Bankrupt has realized his knowledge and power have no use in Northport City Government. The City of Northport may be on a fast track to failure but the only thing “Mayor Phillips” can provide at this point is assisting in the investigation of the murder of Northport, Al. We wish Dale the best and while this column in no way reflects facts or views of the N.N.N we wish Mayor Phillips the best into his investigations into this tragedy. The City Council President has more power than the Hellcat that eluded police last night through town. RIP, Northport.

Fairfield, a suburb of Birmingham, which filed for Chapter 9 bankruptcy in 2020 due to severe economic decline, lost tax...
06/15/2026

Fairfield, a suburb of Birmingham, which filed for Chapter 9 bankruptcy in 2020 due to severe economic decline, lost tax revenue following major industrial and retail closures, and millions in unpaid debts.

The most significant and historic municipal bankruptcy in Alabama was Jefferson County. In 2011, it filed for what was then the largest municipal bankruptcy in U.S. history, reaching a staggering $4.3 billion in debt largely tied to a massive expansion and repair of its sewer system. The county officially navigated its way out of bankruptcy in 2013 after a landmark debt restructuring agreement.

The City of Northport is on track to become the 3rd City in the State to declare Bankruptcy. Given its Careless and wreck less decisions by City Leaders, Northport is on track for the inevitable. The City of Northport, built on the banks of the Black Warrior River and held together by Loyalty, Strong family values and excellence leadership has now been declared a murder by its current representation.

As we grieve the City of Northport, the N.N.N is confident a Go Fund me will be started by the City Council President as well as a Major Developer. If any residents happen to be the beneficiaries of any of the Go-Fund me Money, the N.N.N will personally and publicly kiss your a$$ during 5:00 traffic at the intersection of Hwy 82 and Hwy 43.

Stay with the N.N.N for further breaking news as we mourn the loss of our beloved City.

06/11/2026

NNN has learned that the council will hold a special called meeting tonight at 5:30pm at the Bank of Northport (formerly known as City Hall) to determine validity of a proposed 4.8M dollar investment to attract Big Mikes steakhouse.

NNN caught up with Big Mike who confirmed that he wasn’t that attractive but he is no fool when suckering people.

NNN was unable to catch up with entrepreneur and soon to be local competitor Big D**e.

While President D**es was not available she did submit a text to NNN’s questioning. “We will all sell our souls to sink our teeth into some juicy meat.”

Mayor Phillips confirmed those sentiments by saying he would “give his left nut for Big Mikes meat in his mouth”

Stay with NNN as this story develops

Northport will hold a special called meeting for economic incentive for a new restaurant at next council meeting. Rumor...
06/04/2026

Northport will hold a special called meeting for economic incentive for a new restaurant at next council meeting. Rumor is the portion size are above average and women with 3 baby daddies eat free. Stay with NNN for further developments.

Big Mikes Steakhouse, scheduled to open sometime in 2027 files lawsuit against the City After a Northport council person...
06/02/2026

Big Mikes Steakhouse, scheduled to open sometime in 2027 files lawsuit against the City After a Northport council person is planning to open its own Steakhouse next door to Big Mike’s, similar name and similar menus.
Stay with the N.N.N for details as this story develops.

Official Statement from the Northport News Network While our current Traffic Captain is seeking treatment from alcoholis...
04/13/2026

Official Statement from the Northport News Network

While our current Traffic Captain is seeking treatment from alcoholism, the N.N.N proudly introduces our new traffic Captain. Please join us in welcoming Captain Crunch to the Traffic Desk. Captain Crunch has a long history of observing Traffic Conditions and while he may have a slight alcohol problem it is nothing compared to the current Traffic Ass hat! Welcome to the team Captain Crunch.

The N.N.N is proud to welcome Captain Johnathon Silvers to our traffic team! From the age of 9, Johnathon has had a pas...
03/28/2026

The N.N.N is proud to welcome Captain Johnathon Silvers to our traffic team! From the age of 9, Johnathon has had a passion for traffic. When Johnathon is able take a break from Traffic reporting you can find Johnathon enjoying Sun Bathing in the n**e, urinating in public and studying the affects of roundabout’s in Southern Cities. While Johnathon may be no captain, he once piloted a rented pontoon boat on lake Mitchell. When asked what makes Johnathon different from other Captains, Johnathon said, “well I don’t really know, I know I’m fairly accessible and I will not post names or numbers of folks in my reports”. Please join us in welcoming Captain Johnathon Silvers to the N.N.N traffic team.

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