04/05/2024
A short story, the girl with the red shoes.
After spending most of 1976 working in London and travelling around Europe and South East Asia I returned to Australia where I spent the summer working in a Western Australian mine raising money to fund my future travel. By April 1977 I had had enough of the isolation of the mines and returned to London.
Soon after my arrival I spotted an advertisement by Top Deck Travel in the Australasian Express, they were seeking tour drivers and couriers, having experienced a beer fest trip with Top Deck the previous year I applied. The interview took all of five minutes, questions to which I supplied bu****it answers. As a result of that interview I left London a few days later on April 27, 1977 as a trainee on a seven-week grand European tour.
Three other trainees joined me, fellow Aussie Spike Cawthorn, DBK a Pom and Ray a Kiwi. Our instructor/courier, Dave Reed from Rhodesia and the sixteen paying passengers at London's Victoria Station for the quick trip to Dover and the ferry to Calias. Awaiting us there was Knackers our bus and its driver Mick Carroll also an Aussie all ready to commence our seven weeks around Europe via Instanbul.
Our punters were a couple of Aussie guys, a bloke from Bahrain with the remainder young Aussie and Kiwi girls with the exception of one woman from California and two gorgeous Mexican girls. The punter who apart from the rest was an attractive girl from Tasmania, not that she was super gorgeous, all the girls were. It was the way she dressed, she wore very nice fashionable dresses, all the time. In addition to those chic dresses, she was adorned with a pair of bright red high-heeled shoes.
By the time we climbed aboard Knackers we were all the best of friends who had stocked up on a wide selection of duty free grog while onboard the ferry. Those duty frees were cracked open as soon as Knackers wheels started to turn, all except us trainees who were to have our first driving experience on the way to Paris driving for the first time, Knackers, a Bristol Lodekka crash gear box.
As soon as we were on the open road Mick pulled over and picked me out of the us four who were all inwardly hoping not to be the first victim behind the wheel for we had all been watching Mick at work manipulating the clutch and gearstick like a well tuned orchestra. However, it was not to be, I was selected as the first guinea pig.
I eased Knacker’s clutch in, slipped it into first and slowly rolled away from the kerb. At walking speed, I hit the clutch again, slipped her into neutral clutching quickly again and into second with a very loud grinding clunk for the art of aligning the speed and revs for a smooth transition into second gear was beyond my skill set at that time.
This was the first taste of how it would be for the next hour, changing gears up and down through from first to fifth gear. I don't know what the punters thought as a crashed every gear change with the horrible grating of the cogs in the gearbox. It was obvious that they had an absolute amateur behind the wheel of their bus.
After thousands upon thousands of gear changes over the following seven weeks, I finally gained some mastery over the gear changes on Knackers experienced enough to work the crash-box instinctively, double clutching without fault. However ... when distracted, I would be brought back to earth with a crunching of the cogs when the ‘gear-change stars’ did not align.
Once released from driving and another of the trainees took over, I settled in with the punters with a few drinks, those few being an understatement. While I was enjoying myself, I was relieved to hear the other trainees making a similar hash job of the gear box as I had. The girl with the red shoes as she became known never took her heels off, whenever she moved within the bus upstairs or downstairs her clip clop echoed throughout both decks, it was to be this way for the next seven weeks, it transpired that her red shoes were the only footwear that she brought along.
As it had been a long day from London's Victoria Station and even longer with a group of novices behind the wheel, we didn't make Paris that night, camping at a services. I slept downstairs with the other crew and woke with a bursting bladder in the early hours in total pitch darkness. I was quite disorientated due to the darkness, those few drinks and the fact the buses door was not where I thought it was. I looked at the rear side as I was thinking of my beer fest experience, for Knackers door was the emergency door at the rear. Stuck, I had two choices, p**s myself or use the kitchen sink. It didn't take Einstein to decide on the kitchen sink. Relieved, I went back to bed and slept like a dead man.
The next few weeks were a blur, driving, bus maintenance, spiels on every place and monument that we visited and partying where two of the trainees found themselves very popular with most of the girls who shared these two blokes. The girl with the red shoes stood out from the others, every day she dressed herself in one of her very pretty frocks and presented perfectly with her hair and makeup. We visited the casino in Monaco and she in an evening gown and as always her red heels.
Mick left us in Italy, leaving Dave Reed to look after us as we continued on, a ferry from the southern Italian port city of Brindisi deposited us on the Greek Island of Corfu where we took up temporary residence at Camping Dionysus. Corfu for us was a place of little work and an everlasting party. The Dionysus bar kept us entertained for the first day and night, this was followed by the Ouzo cruise, as if we hadn't had enough of Ouzo already at Dionysus.
The combination of an unending supply of ouzo, son, water, an old Greek fishing boat and a group of sc****ly clad young women and a few similarly attired young men, the cruise was nothing but a great day out full of debauchery. That night was quiet, most were in bed soon after dinner, all partied out.
The following day it was a free day for the punters, some took it easy around camp while others took the local bus in Corfu town for some shopping and sight-seeing while Dave took us trainees to a nearby restaurant, nicely perched on a cliff top overlooking the glistening blue waters of the Ionian Sea with this particular stretch between Corfu and the Mainland of Albania and Greece known as Lake Butrint.
It didn't take long for the previous days activities to return, but without the girls. The ouzo again flowed freely, with Dave's talk on our progress as trainees soon fell by the wayside. We were well served with Greek dishes that became my favourite foods for the rest of my life. The waiter took to teaching us the Sirtaki and the art of the Traditional Greek table dance. Dancing with a table was easier than first thought, I grasped the corner of the table using my teeth and while hugging the table leg against my body I stood and danced with my arms outstretched, a feat which I managed without losing any teeth. We made it back to Dionysus just before dinner and continued the party at the Campsite bar with the punters.
After another days rest and bus maintenance we took a much smaller ferry on the short hop to Igoumenitsa and continued through Greece to Istanbul, however on the return leg to Greece we came across a roadblock. It was found that our punter from Bahrain, Mohammed had only a single entry visa to Greece and he'd used that the first time through. The nearest Greek Consulate was at Edirne some 120 kilometres from our border crossing at Ipsala.
Dave in his wisdom chose me to take Mohammed to Edirne, get his visa and chase them up in Greece or Yugoslavia, depending on how quick we were. I'm unsure why he chose me, it was either he wanted to be rid of me or that I had the capacity to look after my Arab mate. Dave gave me a handful of cash and the relevant instructions, we waved goodbye to our travel companions and headed north on a local bus. By the time we got to Edirne it was dark and the consulate was closed, I chose what looked like a cheap hotel that was nearby. After a meal we settled into the hotel to find that it operated mostly as a brothel with constant noise of the comings and goings of people.
First thing after breakfast we were at the doors of the consulate and for a fee they promptly issued the required visa.
We took a series of buses back to Ipsala, through the border and onwards to Kavalla. Not knowing where the campground we took a taxi who dropped us off at a darkened Camping place, after a bit of wandering we found Knackers parked right on the beach. We were welcomed back on board with cheers, a beer and dinner, which was just being served. Dave was amazed that we made it as quick as we did as they had only arrived some five hours before us.
The trip continued without any dramas and before we knew it the end was approaching with a little over a week remaining we were camped as a campsite in Lucerne, everybody spent this, a free day in town while I remained with Knackers to adjust the brakes, check the vitals and tighten everything that needed tightening. However, I was not alone. The girl with the red shoes decided to remain and work with me as my assistant wearing a lovely frock and her ever-present red shoes of course. Even though she was a different person where at first glance she appeared to be high and mighty, she wasn't. She always chipped in to do her jobs and mixed in well with everybody.
But there was one thing that irked all aboard Knackers was her bonking. The constant bonking was ever present, with those red-heeled shoes she could be heard walking along the aisle upstairs, downstairs and even up and down the stairs. Bonk, bonk, bonk seemingly endless bonk, bonk, bonk, bonking.
Anyway, back to Lucerne. After a couple of hours working in just my shorts I was blackened all over from the grease and grime collected by Knackers over the past 20 odd years. The girl with the red shoes hadn't done much to help as her hands and frock were still pristine, however she said that she would help me clean myself up. A short time later I was enjoying my hot shower when I was surprised as she stepped in to help me clean up, she had soap, shampoo and a flannel. As I looked her up and down I realised that it was the first time I had ever seen her when she wasn't wearing her red shoes.
The trip finished with good reports from the punters and Dave recommended that Pat and myself be employed as drivers and Spike and DBK as couriers. He also recommended that Spike and I never be permitted to work together, for as a team we were dangerous.
Back in London I spent a few days at my share house in North Finchley with the people I had been living with off and on since February the year before as I was moving to the bunk room/cellar at Top Decks office in Fulham. This would allow me to work on my bus for my first assignment. But before I left I received a parcel in the post, I immediately recognised a pair of nearly worn out Red High Heeled Shoes. With that gift was a note saying that seeing that I liked those shoes so much, they were a gift to me. The note also disclosed an address and a red lipstick kiss with a PS, 'Come visit me soon.'
Alas, I couldn't for DBK, Knackers and I left London a few days later on our first seven-week European trip as fully-fledged crew.