01/06/2026
Fine
I've lived many a lie to not recognize one when I see it
But my smiles are so damn pleasant and amiable
That no one would even dare believe there's an atom weight of sorrow within me.
I'm everybody's "go-to guy", but how fascinating is it that they can't just see that I'm equally as needy as they are?
Nobody checks on the fixer.
Nobody knocks on the door of the one who always has an open door.
They pour into me like I'm a vessel with no bottom,
And I receive it, graciously, because somewhere along the line,
That became the only version of me anyone bothered to keep.
I have perfected the art of being fine.
So fine, in fact, that I've started to fool myself.
But the body keeps score when the mind refuses to.
And at 2am, when the performances are over and the audience has gone home,
I sit with a heaviness that has no name,
Only weight.