10/16/2026
I didn’t think I would need to make this request but here we are.
If we arrest you, we kindly ask that you do not pull your pants down and plop a log in our backseats while on the way to the jail.
We will make you clean it up with your own shirt. Jail trustees will also have to clean it up, and you are going to be staying with them for a few days. Might not be a smart idea to make your new roommates clean up your p**p. 💩
Anyway… thanks.