Dibble Police Department

04/20/2022

Today we'd like to take a moment to pause and reflect on an event that had a significant impact on the relationship between US citizens and law enforcement. During this event 29 years ago, the US federal government, Texas state law enforcement, and the US military came together in an unprecedented spirit of cooperation and comraderie that showed the nation what law enforcement is really capable of in this country. Today we recognize the Waco Incident.

During this operation, 76 people, including 25 children and two pregnant women, were freed from the influence of David Koresh and the Branch Davidian cult. During the siege and subsequent assault, joint forces were able to use thousands of rounds of ammunition, 3 UH- 60 Blackhawk helicopters, 2 UH-1 Iroquois helicopters, 9 M3 Bradley fighting vehicles, 7 M728 Combat Engineering Vehicles, 2 M1A1 Abrams Battle tanks, an M88 tank retriever, some really cool aircraft, and hundreds of canisters of CS gas. Additionally during the nearly two month siege costing nearly a million dollars a week, ATF, FBI, and State police were able to accrue thousands of hours of overtime and hazardous duty pay.

Of course, no operation of this caliber is without its problems, so we'd like to recognize the 4 ATF agents who lost their lives during the incident. These men were truly American heroes. Their legacy will live on in the hearts and minds of law enforcement officers everywhere.

As for those critics that say that loss of life and tax dollars spent were unnecessary and egregious we'd like to point out that the federal government conducted a full investigation into their actions and concluded that they were not at fault.

In recognition of this momentous occasion, Dibble Police officers will be allowed to turn off their body cameras for the entire day.

03/19/2022

Fellow upstanding citizens, we'd like to talk to you about an important topic - ghosts. Or, more specifically, ghost GUNS.

Guns are scary and dangerous.
Ghosts are scary and dangerous.
GHOST GUNS take two things that are scary and dangerous, and make them into one thing that is even MORE scary and dangerous. Why would any law-abiding citizen even WANT to do that?

I'll answer for you - they WOULDN'T. Only criminals would want a gun that can easily be used to evade police and commit mass murder without a trace. You're not a criminal, are you? (Please let us know if you are)

Aside from that, ghost guns are highly illegal. We think. We're not entirely sure which law makes them illegal, but we're 99% sure that they are. There are a lot of laws covering guns, so some of them MUST make undetectable, untrackable, untraceable killing machines illegal.

We know you want to obey the law. So take our advice - don't mess with ghost guns. And keep following the law - it's there for your own good.

02/18/2022

The Dibble Police Department would like to remind you that, in a lot of ways, we're just like you. We love getting new toys that help us do our job more efficiently. What man doesn't get excited about a new deluxe lawnmower? What woman doesn't get excited about a fancy new vacuum cleaner? Of course, our new equipment is really about protecting and serving YOU.

That's why we're pleased to show off our new Parking Enforcement vehicle. Being a police officer is a dangerous job, and parking enforcement is important work. Criminals, (or as I like to call 'em, perps), won't be able to endanger the lives of our good citizens quite so easy anymore with this sheepdog on the road.

Remember - this is all about making YOU safer.

02/04/2022

We here at the Dibble Police Department recognize that racism has been an insidious and pervasive problem in law enforcement. We want you to know we're tackling this problem like it's a seven year old with an unlicensed lemonade stand. Therefore, we have created the position of "Diversity Czar" to combat racism in the department.

Please congratulate our new Diversity Czar, Officer Seymour Whites!

02/03/2022

Your friends at the Dibble Police Department would like to remind you that Ma*****na, or "w**d" is a potent and dangerous narcotic that can land you in jail, cost you thousands in fines and court fees, and forever tarnish your legal record. If it wasn't a harmful drug, why would we be willing to ruin your life over it?

"We Enforce Because We Care"

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02/02/2022

Why is Spike Cohen picking on me?