03/21/2026
Denmark is Calling all Americans – on both sides of the aisle 🔵🔴
For over 50 years, we in Denmark have looked toward the United States with our mouths wide open in pure admiration. You didn’t just influence us; you defined us.
We soaked up your culture like a sponge—your music was the soundtrack to our lives, your sports were our entertainment, and your technological innovations shaped our every day.
You were the brave ones, the smart ones, the visionaries. Everything coming out of the U.S. was "fu***ng awesome," as the kids say over here now. You proved to the world that you could do anything: land on the moon, reinvent sports, and literally invent the future. You were our North Star 🤩
But now, you’ve embarked on a new project that we just don’t understand yet:
Hatred!
It seems like both sides have finally agreed on one thing: hating each other!
It’s fascinating to watch a people smart enough to lead the world now spend 100% of their energy on hating their neighbor.
Maybe hate is your new big export?
Since you’re the brilliant cultural leaders we’ve always looked up to, there must be a genius plan behind all this hate So, could you give us a few tips on this next big trend?
How do you hate the "right" way? Is there a specific technique for spewing toxic sludge in the comments to make it as nasty as possible? How do you achieve peak hatred? How do you learn to ignore all logic and history just to win a hate-contest on Facebook?
What’s the payoff? Is there some kind of rush that comes from living in a nation that’s tearing itself in half? Does being this good at hating actually make you happy? Can happy people hate too, or is it an advantage if you just hate yourself?
Thanks in advance for your expertise. We’re waiting on the edge of our seats to learn how to effectively destroy everything built over generations. It clearly takes a very specific kind of American genius.
We love you—but if you’re really good at this, maybe we’ll learn how to hate you! Congrats.