The Newton Infestigator

The Newton Infestigator The Newton Infestigator - Foraging for the Truth Since 2024

Home of Waffles the Raccoon

Formerly the page for Newton, Iowa's famous "2020 Derecho Monument"

*** FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE ***March 12, 2026Ribbon Cutting To Be Scheduled for Raccoon Hotel Opening at Site of Former 20...
03/12/2026

*** FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE ***

March 12, 2026

Ribbon Cutting To Be Scheduled for Raccoon Hotel Opening at Site of Former 2020 Derecho Monument

“Well it’s settled,” said a City of Newton spokesperson at a press conference at City Hall earlier today. “No, not the court case. That is still going on, unfortunately. But City Council HAS approved a change to the zoning code to allow for ‘Non-Human Mammal Short Term Lodging’ as an approved use to be added in the downtown business district.”

This decision follows on the heels of a recent decision by the Jasper County District Court denying the property owner’s comically ironic efforts to “enforce” a 2023 settlement agreement that required, among other things, for the building be demolished no later than February 2, 2024. According to the ruling, the demolition, which was finally completed in the fall of 2025, does not comply with city code because the exterior “party wall” is exposed to the elements.

Rather than comply with city code, the property owner immediately pivoted to trying to find an alternate use for the building site. Much to the delight of a large colony of recently unhoused raccoons (many of whom formerly occupied the famously “dangerous and infested” structure), the exterior wall has been converted to serve as the frontage of a Raccoon Hotel, complete with a balcony and a neon sign. At press time it appeared the hotel was at full occupancy with a raucous group of raccoons enjoying what appeared to be the small mammalian equivalent of a block party - so apparently the term “party wall” has taken on new meaning.

Details of the upcoming ribbon cutting ceremony will be shared as soon as they become available.

Did everyone catch the newest addition to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade?!? Special thanks to the Derecho Monument T...
11/27/2025

Did everyone catch the newest addition to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade?!? Special thanks to the Derecho Monument Trustees for sponsoring the Waffles™️ balloon.

*** FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE ***November 25, 2025City of Newton Unveils New Holiday Light Display at Former Home of Displac...
11/26/2025

*** FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE ***

November 25, 2025

City of Newton Unveils New Holiday Light Display at Former Home of Displaced Urban Raccoon Colony

Newton residents will have a new place to gather and spread holiday cheer this Christmas season. Santa’s little helpers (also known as public works staff) were hard at work this week installing a new lighted display at the site formerly occupied by Newton’s renowned 2020 Derecho Monument…and its famously feisty furbearing fellowship. “We have received the message loud and clear that Newton’s citizens miss those little critters,” said a representative of city government prior to the official unveiling ceremony. “This is the city’s way of honoring their memory.”

The new display will be officially lit for the first time during the annual Courthouse Lighting event on November 28. Holiday revelers visiting this spectacle will be treated to complementary cider, as well as a massive holiday-themed fireworks show - scheduled to begin at exactly 6:57 PM. Visitors are asked to avoid the city parking lot adjacent to the display as it will be used as a staging area for the fireworks. Downtown businesses are also being advised to cover any exterior windows facing the courthouse square due to the potential for earth shaking explosions and flying projectiles.

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