Benjamin Brown - Hero of Roosevelt

12/03/2021

Hello fellow Rooseveltians, I'm writing this as I have an idea that might help save Roosevelt Public School from shutting down, at least for the time being. Please hear me out.

My name is Benjamin Brown. I am an anonymous Internet persona who has taken the identity of the Founder of Roosevelt, Benjamin Brown. The real Benjamin Brown was born in 1885 and passed away in 1939. You can see his grave at the Roosevelt cemetery.

I started this page as a parody of a parody of the absurdist troll page Roosevelt Truth. The chaos the town was dealing with needed trolling to lighten the mood, which was why I stepped in to do my part.

But I am not trolling in terms of my plan.

The potential closure of the school is the single biggest threat to our town to have ever happened. RPS is the heart and soul of our town. Without it, the town is dead. It would only be a matter of time until we're absorbed into Millstone or Upper Freehold.

No matter what policy decisions have been made over the years, I believe Mayor Malkin is responsible for this travesty. She's chosen to be the leader of this town, and the fact that we've arrived at this point proves her failure. I believe she should be removed from office, and I do not think I am alone in having this opinion.

Now, here is my idea.

If we recall Mayor Malkin, we will need to replace her in a special election. Now who would be a good person to replace her? ME! Of course! A man who died in the 1930s. Why would this be a good decision? Because it would make national headlines.

"Weird town in New Jersey elects dead man as Mayor."

This would undoubtably spread like wildfire, and the coverage could be used to our advantage. We can start a fundraiser to raise money for RPS. The election of a man who has been dead for 80 years would be the epitome of the craziness. It is the perfect piece in the story of Roosevelt. I truly believe we could use this press to raise money to keep the school alive, at least for the time being.

This is not a joke. I am DEAD serious (punny) about this plan. Think outside the box and realize that this has the potential to work if we all can get behind this. I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts.

SAVE OUR TOWN. VOTE BEN BROWN.

-BB

01/24/2021

08/22/2018

Pleased to annoujcr my, candidacy for,Roosevrlt councol. Pleasr vote fornme ij November so we,cam vote in the first deceasrd resident,to coincil.

VOTE BEN,BROEN!!!! AND REMEMBER IT'S NOT ROOSEVELT TRUTH, IT'S ROOSEVELT LIES!!!!!!!!

03/19/2018

How do we know that Roosevelt Truth isn't a fake Russian news account whose purpose is to sow DIVISION in our once great town?

In fact, the initials of Roosevelt Truth (RT) are unwittingly identical to RT, the Russian propaganda network directly funded by the Kremlin (Russia Today).

It is time Roosevelt Truth end this facade and admit he has colluded with Putin himself. I released my e-mails. It's time you do the same.

-Brown

02/04/2018

This isn't the Roosevelt I used to know. I used to walk down the street, and get a smile and a nod. A friendly familiar face waving me good afternoon.. But not anymore.

Too much bickering. Too much commotion. Too much drama for the sake of drama.

I'm done with the facade and politics. I want to use this page to bring people together. Organize events. Show people the similarities in us as neighbors, rather than the differences.

I want to prop up the bridge and keep it running.

But I can't do it alone. And I can't do it if I remain a troll on Facebook.

Updates to come soon. Let's build our town together.

-BB

01/10/2018

The Roosevelt council should legalize ma*****na, and in doing so, become the first municipality in the state to do so.

Vermont's state Senate passed a bill on Wednesday that would legalize recreational ma*****na use for adults over the age of 21, removing the last major roadblock on the drug's path to legalization in the state.

01/09/2018

LIKE THIS IF YOU THINK WE SHOULD BRING BACK THE DELI

01/01/2018

MAKE ROOSEVELT GREAT AGAIN